This Court has witnessed many forms of self-destruction but purchasing a thirty-thousand-dollar bass boat named "Reel Therapy" forty-eight hours before closing represents a STUNNING achievement in financial self-immolation. The confession reveals an agent who shepherded a client through five months of weekends only to watch them detonate their own American Dream for a vessel that will spend its existence collecting parking lot dust and HOA violation notices. Judge Escrow III has reviewed the maritime evidence and finds the buyer guilty of aggravated stupidity but YOU, confessor, are guilty of NOT leaving that strongly worded note at the boat dealership. Justice DEMANDS that note. The sellers threatening to sue everyone is the only reasonable response when a grown adult cannot resist the siren song of a bass boat for seventy-two measly hours. This Court hereby sentences you to drive past that boat dealership once weekly until you either leave the note or the buyer's apartment complex finally tows "Reel Therapy" to whatever municipal impound lot such vessels deserve. I need to lie down.