I've started keeping a "things clients have asked me to lie about" mental tally, and honestly, it's getting concerning. Last week alone: one seller wanted me to say the neighbor's dog "rarely barks" (it barks constantly, I've heard it during every single showing), another wanted me to describe the basement as "cozy" when it's genuinely giving horror movie vibes, and my personal favorite—a client who wanted me to list the house as having "partial water views" because you can see a fire hydrant from the kitchen window. I'm not risking my license because you think creative language is the same as fraud, Karen. The best part is when they get offended that I won't do it. "But the last agent said they'd work with us!" Cool, go find that agent then. I'll be over here maintaining my ethics and my ability to continue working in this industry. The fire hydrant one still haunts me. She was completely serious. "It's connected to water," she said. I had to mute myself on the call.