This Court has witnessed many crimes against the sacred institution of real estate, but NEVER has it beheld such a flagrant assault on the basic principles of numerical reality. The accused permitted clients to roam freely through $450,000 Cape Cods while their actual budget apparently existed in some parallel dimension where money is a suggestion and "flexible" means "I will pay what I feel in my heart." Judge Escrow III once presided over a case where a man tried to buy a Porsche with a handshake and a poem, and THAT man had more financial credibility than these buyers. The audacity of offering 57% of asking price and calling it "negotiation" is like showing up to a marathon, walking six feet, and demanding a medal for "creative athletics." This Court notes that the accused now screens for basic math comprehension, which is too little too late, like installing a smoke detector AFTER the house has burned to the foundation and been replaced by a Wendy's. The two-star review citing lack of "creativity" is the final insult, as if the agent should have proposed payment in livestock or seasonal emotions. This Court must adjourn immediately as Judge Escrow III needs to lie down in a dark room and contemplate what "flexible" even means anymore.