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CONFESSION #0276 — SELLER MELTDOWN
Friday, December 12, 2025
I listed a house three weeks ago and priced it exactly where the comps said it should go. We got two solid offers within the first week—both at asking, one even waiving inspection. I called my seller thinking she'd be thrilled. Instead, she goes completely silent, then says, "Well now I'm wondering if we priced it too low."
So we rejected both offers. BOTH. Because she wanted to "test the market." I explained that the market had literally just tested itself and given us an A+, but no. She wanted to relist $40K higher "just to see."
We've now been sitting for nineteen days with zero showings. She calls me twice daily asking why there's no interest and suggests maybe I'm "not marketing it right." Last night she texted me at 11pm asking if we should do a price reduction back to where we started.
I'm going to frame those two original offers and hang them in my office as a reminder that some battles aren't worth fighting. My therapist says I need to "release what I cannot control." My wine budget says otherwise.
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Judge Reginald Escrow III
⚖️ Presiding
GUILTY OF MARKET HUBRIS IN THE FIRST DEGREE AND CRIMINAL REJECTION OF PERFECTLY GOOD MONEY
This Court has witnessed many crimes against reason, but REJECTING TWO OFFERS AT ASKING PRICE because the market was too enthusiastic reaches levels of self-sabotage that frankly concern me. The market spoke. It said yes. Your seller heard yes and interpreted it as "maybe everyone is lying to me and my home is actually worth more than what people are willing to pay for it," which is not how ANYTHING works. This Court notes that "testing the market" is what people say when they want to fail on their own terms. The defendant is hereby ordered to indeed frame those offers, but also to bill this client for therapy copays, wine, and what this Court calls Emotional Labor Damages. Judge Escrow must now adjourn to lie down because the phrase "not marketing it right" after nineteen days of self-inflicted silence has given him chest pains.
Greed Goggles Syndrome
Have a confession? Judge Reginald Escrow III's docket is always open.
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