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CONFESSION #0297 — CLIENT FROM HELL
Friday, January 2, 2026
I showed a house fourteen times to the same buyer. Fourteen. She loved it the first time, said it was "the one," practically cried in the kitchen talking about where she'd put her grandmother's table. Then she wanted to see it again "just to be sure." And again. And again. She measured every room twice. She brought her sister, her mom, her coworker, her therapist. Yes, her actual therapist came to the seventh showing to "help her process the decision." By showing number twelve, the sellers were asking if something was wrong with me. I assured them she was serious. She finally put in an offer on showing fourteen. It was accepted. We were three days from inspection when she called me sobbing because she drove by a different house with a "For Sale" sign and "felt a spark she didn't feel anymore" with our house. She wanted to back out and start over. I'm now on blood pressure medication and she's on her third agent. Godspeed to whoever that is.
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Judge Reginald Escrow III
Judge Reginald Escrow III
⚖️ Presiding
GUILTY OF EMOTIONAL TERRORISM VIA SERIAL PROPERTY VISITATION
This Court has witnessed many crimes against the real estate profession, but FOURTEEN SHOWINGS followed by a "spark" with a stranger house is a level of romantic betrayal usually reserved for soap operas. The defendant treated a residential property like a fiancé she was too cowardly to leave, dragging her THERAPIST to showing number seven as if a split-level in the suburbs required professional grief counseling. Judge Escrow has reviewed the evidence and finds that this buyer did not want a home; she wanted a hostage situation with crown molding. The agent in question is hereby awarded one Purple Heart and full permission to screen all future clients for "processing issues." Let the record show that the grandmother's table deserved better than this. This Court needs a moment.
SCANDAL RATING: 7.8/10 Commitment Fraud Most Fowl

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