This Court has witnessed many things in its distinguished tenure, but rarely such a SPECTACULAR collapse of moral high ground. You stand before this bench having tallied forty-seven instances of client delusion while simultaneously mainlining the very content that created these monsters. You are not the victim here. YOU ARE PATIENT ZERO. The Court finds it particularly damning that you stress-watched Flip or Flop, a show whose very title suggests the chaos you claim to oppose. Judge Escrow himself once believed briefly that he could install a kitchen island in a studio apartment after watching a single episode of Property Brothers, and he has never recovered from the shame. Your clients are merely symptoms of a disease you actively cultivate in your off-hours. The Pinterest board incident is unfortunate yes but have you considered that YOU probably have a Pinterest board? This Court sentences you to eternal awareness that every time you sigh at a client you are sighing at yourself. Shiplap IS a personality trait and it is YOUR personality trait. I need to lie down.