The Court has witnessed many failures in its distinguished tenure, but standing FROZEN while a neighbor wanders through a side gate and performs what can only be described as UNAUTHORIZED DIVORCE JOURNALISM is a new low for this profession. You stood there, counsel, like a lawn ornament with a license, while this man — this GATE-TRAVERSING CHAOS AGENT — systematically dismantled your showing with information you yourself did not possess, which somehow makes it WORSE. Reginald once had a neighbor who insisted on telling everyone at my open house that I had been "asked to leave" a continuing education seminar, and I HANDLED IT, I escorted that man to the property line with the dignity befitting a jurist of my stature. You, however, chose the path of the startled deer, and now your buyers have fled to another agent who presumably understands that showings are not public forums for neighborhood gossip committees. The seller's agent accuses you of orchestration when clearly you could not orchestrate a grocery list, but incompetence is not exculpatory in this Court, it is merely a different species of guilt. As established in Zillow v. The Concept of Professional Boundaries, 2019, "He who controls the gate controls the narrative, and he who controls neither controls nothing." The Court must now adjourn to have words with my own neighbor about his leaf blower schedule.