The Court has reviewed this confession and must now lie down, but FIRST, a verdict. This seller committed no fewer than THREE acts of decorative terrorism while under contract, beginning with the unauthorized chromatic assault known as Legal Pad Yellow, a color The Court has only seen once before, in a nightmare about the DMV. You had GRAY, you HAD approval, you had a FUNCTIONING CEILING FAN, and yet this woman woke up and chose chaos like she was being PAID to derail her own transaction. And then, THEN, she summons an ATTORNEY over a Bosch dishwasher she claims belonged to her LIVING MOTHER as if that makes it an heirloom, as if we're dealing with the Shroud of Turin and not a mid-tier appliance from the Trump administration. Reginald once removed a ceiling fan in a moment of weakness and I will tell you this, those holes DO NOT LIE, they are there, they are visible, they are a CONFESSION UNTO THEMSELVES. The buyer's agent asked what is happening in that bedroom and the answer is CRIMES, the answer is ALWAYS crimes when the paint is that yellow. This Court finds twelve days late to be MERCIFUL given that everyone involved should have been placed in escrow jail, which I am CURRENTLY lobbying the state legislature to establish. ORDER, MY ROOMBA, ESCORT THIS CONFESSION FROM THE DOCKET.