The Court has reviewed this testimony and finds itself PHYSICALLY ILL at the suggestion that a real estate professional of your alleged caliber simply ACCEPTED the browser question without demanding to speak to that technician's supervisor, their supervisor's supervisor, and ideally the ghost of whoever invented online banking portals in the first place. "Have you tried a different browser" — Reginald once received this exact advice from a Geek Squad employee and subsequently filed a grievance with the Better Business Bureau that remains PENDING to this day because SOME OF US follow through. You sat on hold for two hours like a PASSIVE PARTICIPANT in your own professional demise when the correct response was to drive physically to the nearest Chase branch and REFUSE TO LEAVE until someone with actual system access materialized, as established in the landmark case of Escrow v. That Time My Own Closing Got Delayed And I Camped In The Lobby Until Security Recognized My Determination, 2017. The sellers lived in a HOTEL, the buyers almost walked, and your commission was carved up like a Thanksgiving turkey at a family gathering where nobody actually likes each other — and yet you come before this Court seeking SYMPATHY rather than JUDGMENT. The bank sent an email saying "services have been restored" with the emotional depth of a refrigerator manual, and you ACCEPTED this non-apology like it was legal tender. This Court hereby orders you to print that email, frame it, and hang it above your desk as a monument to the day you let a crashed portal crash your entire professional dignity. Reginald must now go lie down.