The Court has reviewed this timeline with the same horror one reserves for watching a toddler reach for a hot stove fourteen times while the babysitter just takes notes. YOU HAD A FULL ASK OFFER ON DAY EIGHT and you let this woman think about it like she was selecting a LIFE PARTNER and not accepting LEGAL TENDER for her SUBURBAN THREE-BEDROOM. The washer dryer flip-flop alone constitutes a violation of In re: Just Pick Something Already, 2019, wherein The Court ruled that appliance indecision lasting more than four hours is grounds for involuntary commitment. Reginald himself once lost a vintage credenza because he hesitated for ONE AFTERNOON, and that memory haunts me every time I see Danish Modern furniture, which is FREQUENTLY because I have TASTE. You watched this woman hemorrhage twenty thousand dollars in slow motion, blocked her number like a coward, and now you confess to this Court as if documentation absolves you of your complicity in her financial unraveling. The switched agents, the photo changes, the October betrayal — all of it could have been prevented if you had simply said the words NO MORE CHANGES, BRENDA, WE ARE SIGNING TODAY. This Court finds you guilty, orders you to unblock that number and send one text that simply reads "I should have stopped you," and declares this matter CLOSED because Reginald has a showing at four and refuses to discuss barn doors with the listing agent.