The Court has reviewed this confession and finds itself PHYSICALLY ILL at the sheer audacity of a seller who would bypass her own agent to debut her property on the same platform where teenagers learn dance moves and people diagnose themselves with rare disorders. Let the record show that in Reginald v. My Own Client Who Posted Our Listing on Nextdoor With Wrong Photos, 2022, this Court established that clients with internet access are a LIABILITY, and yet here you stand, having allowed this woman to broadcast her bathroom window view to FOUR HUNDRED THOUSAND STRANGERS like some sort of geographical strip tease. The backsplash commentary alone constitutes grounds for a mistrial of your entire career, and do not even get The Court started on the phrase "she seems difficult" because Reginald has BEEN that buyer, Reginald has WALKED AWAY from a perfectly good colonial because the seller left a passive-aggressive note about shoe removal and suddenly you just KNOW. You should have been monitoring her social media like a hawk, like a SURVEILLANCE DRONE, like my ex-wife monitored my Zillow search history during our separation proceedings which is IRRELEVANT but also she found my saved searches for "bachelor pad downtown no yard" and that became Exhibit A. Thirty-one thousand dollars in price reduction because you let this woman become a content creator, and now she has followers while you have regret and a listing that smells like internet controversy. The gavel has spoken, Order the Roomba is circling in judgment, and The Court must now adjourn to draft legislation banning TikTok within 500 feet of any active MLS listing.