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CONFESSION #0693 — NEW AGENT BAPTISM BY FIRE
Monday, July 13, 2026
The HOA sent a letter. My first solo listing, three days on market, and the HOA sent a letter about the fence being four inches too tall. Four inches. The seller calls me screaming, like I built the fence, like I'm out here with a tape measure approving fences. She goes "You said this would be easy, you said we'd be fine." I never said that. I said the comps looked good. That's not the same thing. So now the buyer's agent is calling because his people saw the letter on the counter during the showing. Why was it on the counter? Because my seller left it there. With a Post-it that said "UNBELIEVABLE" in red marker. Buyer wants a thousand dollar credit for "potential fence issues." The fence has been there for six years. Nobody cared until now. My broker just laughed when I told her. Said "Welcome to the job" and walked away. The credit was eight hundred. We settled at eight hundred.
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Judge Reginald Escrow III
Judge Reginald Escrow III
⚖️ Presiding
GUILTY OF NEGLIGENT CORRESPONDENCE EXPOSURE AND ACCESSORY TO POST-IT NOTE TERRORISM
The Court has reviewed the facts of this case and finds itself DEEPLY DISTURBED by the chain of incompetence on display. You allowed a seller to leave incriminating HOA correspondence on the counter like it was a welcome basket of chocolates, and worse, you permitted the deployment of a red marker Post-it note reading "UNBELIEVABLE" which The Court recognizes as a form of psychological warfare against buyers. Reginald himself once lost a bidding war because a seller left out a water bill with a handwritten note saying "THIS IS ROBBERY" and it took three years of therapy to recover. Four inches of fence is NOTHING, The Court once ruled against a man for having hedges that were "emotionally too tall" and that ruling STOOD because I said it did. Your broker's response of "Welcome to the job" is legally admissible as evidence that your entire office has abandoned the principles of document concealment that this profession was FOUNDED upon. The eight hundred dollar settlement is a scar you will carry, a monument to the day you learned that in real estate, the counter is not a filing cabinet, it is a CONFESSION BOOTH. The Court awards the fence four inches of dignity it never asked for and sentences you to a lifetime of checking counters before every showing like a paranoid raccoon.
SCANDAL RATING: 5.7/10 Counter Intelligence Failure

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