The Court has reviewed this confession and must pause to acknowledge the SHEER AUDACITY of a man who thought he could hide ninety-four thousand dollars from both his wife AND the title company, as if judgment liens are merely suggestions that disappear if you believe hard enough. You, Agent, have committed no crime here — you are merely the unfortunate messenger who sold these people a house in 2018 and then had the COSMIC MISFORTUNE to watch their marriage detonate in the same kitchen where you once pointed out the lovely backsplash. Reginald knows this feeling intimately, having once discovered at a closing that the sellers had been running an unlicensed ferret rescue from the basement, and the look on the buyer's face still visits me in dreams. The husband hiding in the backyard on his phone is EXACTLY where cowards belong, and The Court hopes he is googling "divorce attorneys who accept payment plans" because he is going to need one. You are guilty only of being present when the universe decided to teach everyone a lesson about the sanctity of full disclosure, and for that, this Court sentences you to the memory of that wife's face, which you will carry forever. THE GAVEL HAS SPOKEN AND REGINALD MUST NOW GO WATER HIS FERN.