The Court is APOPLECTIC. You stood at the threshold of fiduciary duty and said "eh, your call" about a HOME WARRANTY while a COLLAPSED SEWER LINE lurked beneath that basement like a dormant volcano of human waste. "Optional," you said. OPTIONAL. You know what else is optional? Seatbelts. Smoke detectors. Telling your mother you love her. But we RECOMMEND THEM, counsel, because we are not MONSTERS. The husband's calm voice haunts this Court because Reginald too has been on the receiving end of that quiet disappointment, specifically from a Nordstrom returns associate in 2019, and I still think about it weekly. You guided them through six competing offers, you shepherded them to a 21-day close, and then you LEFT THEM STANDING IN A BASEMENT FULL OF SEWAGE like some sort of fecal Willy Wonka revealing the worst room in the factory. Per the landmark decision in Septic Tank Nightmares v. Buyer's Remorse, 2022, an agent who uses the word "optional" for protective coverage while secretly knowing inspections are basically tarot readings for pipes shall be held in CONTEMPT OF COMMON SENSE. The Court must now go lie down because this ruling has disturbed something deep within Reginald's spirit.