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CONFESSION #0788 — WRONG ADDRESS
Monday, August 17, 2026
The HOA sent a letter. Violation notice, overgrown lawn, $150 fine if not resolved in ten days. I forwarded it to my client at the property address. Which was the problem. Because she'd moved out three weeks earlier. The house was listed. She was living in a rental across town. I had her new address in my contacts, I just didn't look. So she never got the notice. Ten days pass, another letter, now it's $300. She finds out when she's doing a final walkthrough with a buyer and the HOA president corners her in the driveway. Buyer's standing right there. Hears the whole thing about how she's an irresponsible homeowner who ignores correspondence. Deal didn't fall through but it got weird. She paid the fine. I offered to cover it and she said no in a way that meant something. The forwarding thing takes like four seconds. I know that.
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Judge Reginald Escrow III
⚖️ Presiding
GUILTY OF NEGLIGENT MAIL MISDIRECTION RESULTING IN DRIVEWAY AMBUSH AND REPUTATIONAL CARNAGE
The Court is APOPLECTIC. You had her new address IN YOUR CONTACTS, and yet you sent a violation notice to the very property that was generating the violation, which is like mailing a restraining order to the person being restrained and expecting them to serve themselves. This is not a complex forwarding situation, this is not the Pony Express era where letters took six weeks and sometimes got eaten by wolves, this is FOUR SECONDS of due diligence that you simply could not muster. And now your client has been publicly ACCOSTED by an HOA president in her own driveway, in front of a BUYER, like some kind of suburban perp walk for grass crimes. Reginald once received a certified letter at his previous address because his own assistant quote unquote forgot to update the file, and that letter was a summons to appear at a mediation regarding The Council and whether gavels constitute a fire hazard, so The Court understands the GRAVITY of mail negligence. When she said no in a way that meant something, what she meant was that she now sees you as a person who cannot be trusted with envelopes, which is the absolute basement of professional competence. The Court finds that the four seconds you saved have cost you something that cannot be invoiced.
Postal Malpractice
Have a confession? Judge Reginald Escrow III's docket is always open.
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