The Court has reviewed this testimony and frankly, Reginald needs a moment because his left eye has begun to twitch in a manner not seen since the Great Barn Door Incident of 2022. Let us examine the evidence: a seller who rejected TWELVE THOUSAND DOLLARS because buyers displayed the cardinal sin of wanting to purchase her home. "Too eager," she says, as if real estate transactions should be conducted with the emotional availability of a man who "isn't looking for anything serious right now" — and The Court would know, The Court has BEEN that man, The Court has HURT people, but that is NOT the matter before us today. You have enabled this chaos for ELEVEN MONTHS, watching offers die like houseplants in a north-facing window, and when she asked why the house isn't selling, you apparently did NOT reply "BECAUSE YOU ARE THE REASON, DEBORAH." Tuesday inspections! TUESDAY! As established in Coldwell v. A Woman Who Also Had Opinions About Days, 2019, there is no legal distinction between inspection days, and yet here we are, held hostage by someone who treats calendar squares like astrological warnings. The Court sentences you to immediate termination of this listing agreement and a mandatory three-week vacation somewhere with no cell service, because Reginald can see in your confession the hollow eyes of someone who has forgotten what joy feels like. This Court is adjourned because I need to go lie down.