The Court has reviewed this confession and finds itself EXPERIENCING EMOTIONS IT CANNOT PROFESSIONALLY CONTAIN. Let Reginald be absolutely clear: you are not the criminal here, you are the CRIME SCENE. Your broker — this pad-thai-consuming chaos merchant — violated the sacred covenant of "do not contact my client" and then had the AUDACITY to return from his ninety-minute lunch odyssey and ask what YOU learned? What YOU learned?! The Court once had a bailiff who borrowed my gavel without asking and I still bring it up at Thanksgiving, so I understand betrayal on a molecular level. Per the landmark decision in Broker Backstabbery v. Basic Professional Courtesy (2019), when a managing broker directly undermines a listing agent's client relationship by implying commission flexibility exists where none was offered, that broker has committed what we in the legal community call "being an absolute nightmare person." The attorney demanding itemized compensation breakdowns "like you're running a scam out of your Honda" is merely collateral damage from your broker's rogue diplomacy — and frankly, Hondas are RELIABLE VEHICLES that do not deserve this slander. Your cold coffee, your silence, your confusion — these are the wounds of a professional who trusted the system, and the system went to lunch. The Court rules that you are guilty only of working for someone who should be sentenced to explain his own commission structure to a room full of attorneys, and Reginald must now go water his plants because this ruling has made him TOO upset to continue.