The Court has reviewed this confession and finds itself PHYSICALLY ILL at the injustice perpetrated against this agent by what can only be described as an office supply conspiracy of the highest order. Let the record show that in Henderson v. Basic Human Decency (2019), this Court ruled that any client who makes their agent miss a family wedding and then ADMITS TO GETTING STARBUCKS deserves to have their earnest money converted directly into therapy funds for the abandoned agent. Reginald himself once lost a ruling because his bailiff Order vacuumed up a crucial legal document, so The Court understands the pain of administrative equipment betrayal more than you know. HOWEVER, the confession reveals that you did indeed look up the property, you TRACKED the nephew on LinkedIn, you MEMORIZED the purchase price down to the exact dollar, and The Court must ask: are you okay, counselor, because that is the behavior of someone who is NOT okay. The front desk girl is not on trial here today but rest assured The Court has opened a separate docket for her and that sticky note will be SUBPOENAED. This Court hereby declares you a victim of circumstance but also sentences you to delete LinkedIn from your phone before you do something we cannot undo, and Reginald must now adjourn because his breakfast burrito is getting cold and he refuses to eat it like some kind of animal.